Bittersweet Life...

Monday, February 28, 2005

im feelin very cold... not to the extent of shiverin yet... the tension of gettin those damn results is killing me, drivin me insane. god help me.. i've heard rumours bout the math result. it's sooo not expected. my grandma is irritatin to the core.. and im pms-ing real bad. i could be in tears, frustration or juz keep quiet. i feel like a mad person. u noe those certified mad ppl in woodbrigde. dad went out to fetch mum, who insisted on comin to sch. once she comes home, i have to get ready. put on tt green sch skirt for the very, very last time... i feel so nausetic.. i've got stomach upsets.. huge ones. or should i say i've got really huge butterflies in my stomach. i dunno wat to feel.. wat to expect. im scared and worried... it was 36 hrs more to go when i typed in my last entry. it was 24 more hrs when i talked to dL on the phone.. it was ard 11 more hrs to go went i talked to ema dearie... now, it's down to a couple more hrs...

im scared... but i believe im a strong girl... i can take this tension.. i dunno wat else to talk bout...

Smashed into pieces at 2/28/2005 12:13:00 PM

Sunday, February 27, 2005

it's 1.40 am on sunday. probably bout 37 more hrs till the results will be release. i've been havin a hard time sleepin at nite... gosh, imreally terrified. i dunno wat to hope and expect. i feel so stress all of the sudden... feel like crying.. haiz...

let's talk bout AI. anthony looks cute frm far onli. im glad those 2 girls are out... for the guys, im happy tt one of them is leavin.. but cant remember which one.

the bachelor was quite interestin. the last bachelor tt i watched was the first season. a looong time ago... i hope tt jesse chooses jessica. cant believe i watched the bachelor...

ema finally got her iPOD.. congrats. haha....

wenta mom's D&D... horrible. disgusting food. ear-drums-breakin-singers... they sand worse than william hung.. and most of them are old. ugh. oh yeah... i was being praised a lot tt nite.. hehe... hmm... got whistled at pun tau... hehe *tak tau malu*- prolly coz im sleepy.

but i cant sleep...

im crappin A LOT in this entry... sorry for wastin ur time ppl...

oh, wenta do the singpass thingy for the O level courses shit.. i dunno lah. and of all ppl, met rahman and khairul... i woke up damn early in the morn.. bout 7. argh.... didnt expect the boys to wake up early too... haha... finally, the singpass thingy is over and done with...

it's pretty cool tt lots of stuff can be done online.. esp with the new singpass thingy. makes me feel like so adult-ish... so like im-involve-with-the-govt kinda feelin. u noe? nvm... although it's high tech and easy.. tapi leceh. so troublesome one... argh.. i dunno wat else to talk bout actually...

bla.. bla... bla...

Smashed into pieces at 2/27/2005 01:39:00 AM

Thursday, February 24, 2005

yesterday nite, i went to masjid ghufran with my mom.. to dgr syarahan. damn... it was full of makciks.... eww... i was like smsin thruout the hr.. haha.. it's a hr long...

wanted to go out todae... but kinda changed my mind by 2.45... it looks as if it's goin to rain.. haiz.. im bored. been dlding stuff frm 9 in the morn... leave the comp on since then...

liya, i found the cd.. but forgot where i put it.. ill give u on mon.

ali:i chose the template.. tt's y nice.. haha. im doin great, still alive. results pun coming out soon...

liyaaa: hello dearie.. it IS an AWESOME show.. heheh..

yunique: i understand y u dun want those words... hehe.. but anyways, we've got great taste. and tt song by Mase is sooo gd. GROOVIE babe! i have songs by peter pan already.. do recommend more... thanks ya... ;)

Smashed into pieces at 2/24/2005 03:08:00 PM

Wednesday, February 23, 2005

here's another update.... for the day. juz got back for mengaji. didnt want to go actually. but i've promise the nenek tt ill come todae. and i really wanna finsh up th Quran soon.. yeah. 17 yrs old, still not done yet with the Quran.. how slow rite? haha... i noe they're some ppl slower than me.. but i started way long time ago... how long ago? ask me personally.. hehe... took a cab there and back. coz i cant take the hot whether... and coincidentally, it cost me $7.70 each ride. i called for a cab, although i live in tamp and the place is in simei. nurul the laziee bumm.. haha...

my 'ares' is workin again... the thing tt i use to dld stuff... so. it's dlding things faster.. and tt means more songs in my creative... finally. anybody wanna recommend nice songs, feel free to do so.. tag my taggie! and no to hard-metal rockish songs... and no mly songs tt are pathetically slow...

Smashed into pieces at 2/23/2005 04:35:00 PM

o levels results will be out in a few days... it's scariee alrite. to panick or not to panick. everyone's spectulating tt it'll be on fri. how could tt be? when even teachers have no idea. it is onli RUMOURED to be on fri.... it;s so irritating, u noe. everyone exclaimin tt it's on fri... juz shut up and wait for the news. haiz....

im glad to have frens ard.... frens tt i can talk to. frens tt dun judge me one sidedly... im grateful for tt.

im bloggin my tots randomly, so dun mind me...

i've been dldin sex and the city... haha... it's like desperate housewife, but more- how do i put it- sexual? very sexual... now i understand y s'pore decided not to broadcast it here.... actually, it's like watchin pornography... hehe...

i forgot wat i wanted to type... damn.

got it... drove past the site which caught fire yesterday.... it's was cool. haha... depan masjid ghufran there... the fire was pretty nasty... and the fire fighters werent like doin anyhting... hehe.. no cute or gd lookin ones either *grinz* oh well...b4 i left the scene, they juz rolled out the fire hose... but didnt get to see them in action. aiyoh... why so slow? im like suffocatin coz the wind is like blowin the smoke to my area... the soot even got into my balcony, and im stayin on the 12th floor... i hate the burnin smell.. yesterday, the smell was so horrible... the concentration of smoke was thick. now, no more smell.. i think the fire had been put out alreadi...

oh yeah, siti, the anthony guy frm AI is not tt cute. i dun think he's cute anymore. he was on tv.. but when i saw his pic on the net, he's so not the same. but, prolly ill change my mind again.

and ema told me last nite tt she still has my bdae prezzie... and warned me tt if i dun remind her to give me soon, she'll rip the wrappin paper and use the prezzie (a bracelet) herself... muahaha...

i've got this mixed feelings in the pit of my stomach... i dunno wat they are.

should i blog hop? i dun feel like it.. but i wanna do it. but at the same time, im lazy... damn. stop being fickle minded nurul.... im gonna have a hard time decidin my future courses and stuff... thanks to my fickle-mindedness...

waga waga: thank u very much... i dunno for wat. hehe... but i appreciate u tagging.... ;)
schupz: yeah.. thanks girl... dun start ripping the wrapper yet...
siti: oh, shut up! haha.... see you very soon...

Smashed into pieces at 2/23/2005 11:55:00 AM

Monday, February 21, 2005

watched black hawk down last night... it was a terrific movie... didnt expect it to turn out tt way. it was scary.. to be in tt situation. it was a nasty sight... dead bodies everywhere. gun shots being fired everywhere... the part where of them was shot in the leg remember? and his fren had to pull out the bullet frm his leg by putting his hand in... tt's gruesome. but for a gd cause... kinda sad when those soldiers died. it was nasty....

i was sad. i was happy. i was pissed. im insane. who should u trust and rely on? how would u noe tt person is reliable and worth trustin? im confused. i need someone to talk to. anyone.

Smashed into pieces at 2/21/2005 05:13:00 PM

hello... waga waga, it is. i guess u have a different view of me now huh? i cant help it...

i've deleted the post tt waga waga is referin to...

Smashed into pieces at 2/21/2005 04:09:00 PM

Thursday, February 17, 2005

blog and blog... wanted to blog since the morn, but decided not to... so took a bath, ate breakfast. watched tv... i decided to scroll thru my previous entries. those from last yr... the early ones frm when i first started blogging. gosh... i realised tt sch was a huge part of me.. huge part of everyone. almost, in my every entry, was about sch, npcc, rajan, mr kek, SS, mdm gill.... bla bla bla... then, towards the end of the yr, i started to talk bout the table ppl... and bout us taking the major Os... now it's all over. all i can talk bout now is the upcoming results. sad... sch life was fun. the ups and downs of studyin and discovering the rites and wrongs of life. i noe there's more to come. the most precious moment are those during recess, when we crapped and made the ppl ard our table suffer.

it could never be re-lived. i wonder how's the canteen now?

goin out later to tp open house... i basically noe TP already. juz goin for the sake of gettin out of the house.... and eating delifrance. im craving for delifrance, everytime tt advert on mango chicken thingy comes on the tv... yummy! i want delifrance.....

waga waga: frenster's still the way it is... add ur frens, write testimonials... i too cant be bothered wat's new... haha

Smashed into pieces at 2/17/2005 12:04:00 PM

Wednesday, February 16, 2005

lalalalalalala..... no idea wat to do. it's the period when frenster becomes a bore once again. listening to p10.... real boredom i tell ya... chattin with ivan and rahman on msn... wat to do? no mood to blog hop... songs downloadin at a frigging slow speed...

Smashed into pieces at 2/16/2005 03:26:00 PM

im stuck at home... boredom is once again creeping onto me. yesterday, wenta sch to watch the councillor's investiture.

as anyone would expect the turnout of the event, it's was a major letdown. i mean, they onli invited some ppl like parents and ex councillors and the whole werent there to watch. there was even a GOH. siglap was trying to make it a prestigious event. hah! big joke actually... the emcees were hopeless. everything went well when faris- yes, tt faris basha-sth- told the audience tt he lost his speech. so he was creeping when he spoke, adding in this story which was supposed to have a moral to it. honestly, faris, i have no idea wat u're taking about. it's very mundane.... everything. from the procedures to the presentations. of coz, i did commented on almost everything to james. well, he wanted my opnion, so i gave him my most truthful ones. took pics.. caught up with coucillors who i've never met up since last day of sch...

tmr, im goin to tp open house. i dunno who to go with... and im so not going alone...

oh yeah, elfi has finally updated his blog.... hooray! yeah rite... gd job elf...

Smashed into pieces at 2/16/2005 12:21:00 PM

Monday, February 14, 2005

tears started to flow juz b4 she entered the gate. again and again. she's finally left for aus. leaving behind her close buds. now, im all alone. no one to hog the phone with. no one to go shoppin with, since the rest of them are working. it's juz like reliving the day i passed out frm npcc. the POP. tot i could hold back my tears at the airport. but it's was such a stupid thing to do. coz i've been holding the tears back since i was on the train to the airport. since the days of her departure grew nearer.

emotional? yeah.. maybe. we're talking bout someone who im close too. someone who went thru the torturous days back in cca life. someone to bitch ard with when im bored. someone who can spend her money the way i do. well, she is coming back. but, it's like 2 freaking mths... but the time we come back, we'll have no time to catch up, coz of us starting sch. im juz hoping she wont get herself too bz... hey girl, keep blogging. it's a must for ya... update us bout ur add and new hp no. anything tt's news, tell us! esp if u have an aus bf... haha.

after she's out of our sight, we filled out empty stomachs at the staff canteen. so budget... we all wanted to use ali's pass to get discount... aiyoh! haha... after eating, farhana, vic and me went to take the train home. one funny thing happened at the staff canteen: remember ali? or was it shahidah tt was with me? anyways, it was this police officer who kinda 'masuk campur'... haha. in a helpful way actually..

oh yeah, on sat, i wenta eat at hajjah maimunah, the one at geylang. the waiter, named hakeem, was cutee. haha... like the baby-ish look.. ya noe? yeah...

grammy's today was ok.. managed to watch it halfway onli. i was like waiting and waiting for usher to perform, tapi tak kluar2. i was SO lucky i tell ya.. coz i went to bathe first, then when i stepped into my room, there he was! he was performin... phew! juz in time... luckily i didnt wait for it, if not ill be late for ad's departure.. and i cant believe usher didnt win the best r&b male.. sad. but, he's performance was AWESOME!! his moves were like woah...

pics frm adrena's depature...

Smashed into pieces at 2/14/2005 05:20:00 PM

finally im able to watch grammy's, after not being able to coz of sch. now, since im not schooling, i can watch. yay! really... after, bout ten yrs of waiting and oh-no-i-cant-watch complains, me and ma peepz are able to spectate a glamorous event... haha.. 10 more mins to the grammy's.

and todae's da day tt ad's leaving for aus... damn her. ill hate her... coz she's goin aus. ill miss her, coz there's no one else to hang on the phone with. maybe siti will be the next victim... haha... wat do u think siti blurified? happiee bdae siti.. i noe wat u mean bout not feeling 17... see ya later.

armed with moi breakfast, grammy's here i come!

Smashed into pieces at 2/14/2005 08:49:00 AM

Friday, February 11, 2005

updating again. or should i say blogging again. sick of blog hopping... actually no mood to blog hop. i've been spendin lots of time online to download songs for my zen creative... i spent at least 4 hrs a day for the songs part.... and additional of a couple more hrs to blog hop ard... radio doesnt even exists in my life anymore... haha..

juz found out tt liyana updated her bloggie!! haha...

im pathetically bored.

im blogging nth as a matter of fact.

Smashed into pieces at 2/11/2005 05:31:00 PM

guess wat ppl? im moody... yeah. haven't been updating for quite a while, which is sooo not me. didnt had the modd to do so. those tagged my taggie, thank u soo much!

let's c... went out with adrena for the very last time b4 she leaves for australia. we were unbelievably high on shopping. haha... we went mall-hopping. yup, frm taka to parkway to tm. haha... loads of fun i tell ya... but, of coz, we felt tired as well. gosh, im gonna miss her. seriously. bubbye dearest fren... oh well...

im dying soon... haha. rubbish nurul. wat im sayin is tt ppl are talking bout the upcoming release of O level results. i sooo wanna get over it soon. im startin to feel a lil bit nervous and worried. which, again, is so not me. argh... one moment, 2 mths ago, i really wanna noe the results and start schooling to end my boredom. now, as of this freakin mth, i dun want to noe my results. i am not afraid of wat the outcome will be. im willing to face watever tt is written on the cert. aiyoh... i dunno lah... i dunno wat im trying to say also. it's like i dun want the same thing tt happened on the day of the release of O's MT results to happen again. remember my frens? haiz... i dreamt over and over again tt i've gotten a b4. hah! worse than the pervious one. over reacting maybe... i hate myself for doin this. for worrying so much. to the table ppl, all the best for the results.

to ema: hey girl! juz wanna tell ya tt ad's not gonna buy the cd frm ya... wat's up with u? give me a call...

my mind's in a mess... yesh. im totally fickle minded. oh yeah, giving my bro tuition... hehe... laugh all u want. i mean he's sec 2. im sure i can handle it... easy peasy. haha... getting my 'pay' this weekend.. yay!

money doesn't give one happiness. believe me. it will not. it never will. i've wished for a creative, a new hp and cash. but am i happy? i dun think i am. yeah... i got my zen micro. i've got my new hp. im gonna get cash. but i dun feel happy. it's true wat they say- money doesn't pay for happiness.

ill stop babbling now.

Smashed into pieces at 2/11/2005 01:08:00 PM

Saturday, February 05, 2005

hooray~! haha... chalet yesterday was amazing... such a success. well, it started out with troubles such as difficulty doin up the fire for bbq. after tt, it all went well. shall not go into details... kinda long. it was nice seeing 4g peeps again... ppl like fab, alvin, ky, ivan, liya, suz... quite a no turned up. which was gd. i couldnt overnight... wat a bother. but nevertheless, i enjoyed myself. mdm su's kids- insyirah and majdhah- were SO adorable... haha... played with them by throwin ard the beach ball. and believe me, it was tiring enuf. liya da tak berani nak main dgn dorang coz she caused one of them to fall.. jk! haha... played with mdm su also- monkey ball this time ard. dun think tt petite sized mdm su wont be a challenge. she was a threat.. haha. she tackled me for the ball... so violent. there were blowing of bubbles too! kiddish... nah! took pics... like duh! i would have regretted if i didnt turn up. it was a blast. and liya surfaced some potential in becoming a housewife. she was so into bbq-ing and nagging bout the music... haha.. it was nice sight. elfi was totally vain when it comes to takin pics. hmm... well, overall, it was such an enjoyable night. i almost forgot how interesting and ridiculous our class was.

Smashed into pieces at 2/05/2005 01:26:00 PM

Friday, February 04, 2005

i cant wait for the chalet thingy. well, it might be less fun than i expect, but it'll be orite, i hope. anyway, i was reading a book yesterday on my sofa while listening to my creative. then, taufik's 'ibu' come on... when he started singing, i had tt tingling sensation ard my body... u noe sth like goosebumbs? but not excatly like goosebumbs... he's voice is gd. i had those again when he went into the high and smooth notes of the song.

mom allowed me to stay at the chalet till 10 tonight. tt's an improvemt... take it than leave it. life's gettin damn gd... hehe... ryan cabera and jesse mcartney cute. and tt guy frm the show las vegas, tt danny guy, he's sexy and hot....

anyone watched AI? remember tt girl who mimed? wat on earth was she thinking? ridiculous. im bored. im talking shit. toodles... someone's bugging me a lot.. not my parents. juz this someone who's really testing my patience..

Smashed into pieces at 2/04/2005 01:11:00 PM

Thursday, February 03, 2005

4G peepz... listen up. our class chalet is tmr, fri 4th feb.. aloha loyang bunglow 8. u can start coming at 5 onwards. can overnight, but must leave by 12pm the next day. shuttle bus services are provided frm pasir ris interchange. timings check on ur own. there's 'rules and regulations' by mdm su.

*NO drinking and smoking *girl and boy cant be alone in a room *NO outsiders *NO skimpy clothings like mini shorts and bikini tops. no nudity as well (duh!) *one bedroom for mdm su, her husband and kids. three other bedrooms are for us. toilets will be provided.

those are frm mdm su... not frm me. pass ard plz...

oh well, no mood to blog. ema's bloggie not updated... waga waga workin.. so no hilarious entries to read.. haiz. ill juz blog hop ard then... btw, to waga waga. the feelin of owning such an expensive and sophiscated equipmt is nice... heeh... ill leave now... outz.

Smashed into pieces at 2/03/2005 11:09:00 AM

Tuesday, February 01, 2005

i am, finally, a proud owner of Creative Zen Micro. haha.... have been pestering parents for it... so, they plan to get it for my bdae. haha.... yay! it's sliq and sensitive... if it were ever to drop, ill cry. after purchasing the zen micro at funan, we stopped by swesen's... yummylicious. u noe wat? not onli the food.... but the manager there. hehe.... my dad noes him! hmmm.... at first, i brightened up when i saw him smiling. when i got a closer look at him, guess wat? he has dimples... on both sides. he's damn cute, and hot.... dunno if he's married.. haha... he's name, if i can still remember, is Awad Salim (sth else). haiz... his smile.... adds to the yummy-delicious meal... an hr later, we headed to Samar. yeah.. the arabian restaurant. coincidentally, saw ameerah there, working. anyways, the food there once again, was yummy!! there was such a huge serving of it, but i cant resist it, trying to finsh more of wat was serve. to add to the i-ate-a-lot day, i ordered cheesecake.... ohh... the sinful pleasure of it was undescribable. hehe... the onli disappointmt at samar was tt there were no cute guys = (

all tt was on sun onli... such amazing and elaborative bdae i had in yrs... well, on sat, i went to cest la vie. for those who dunno, it's a lil 'musical' performed by sigalp secondary sch. drama club had put up an awesome show.... whereas, the rest was as per norm. the mly dance had a twinge of uniqueness at the end onli.... i've received quite a no of presents and surprises on sat too... thank u ppl... ;>

lastly, thank u very much to these peeps who sent me bdae wishes... i appreciated it lotz... james, ema, aisyah, siti, adrena, sir sara, sir harzelly, hafidz, farzilah, sakinah, azlin, elfi, andy wawa, rabia, andy d, ikh, dong, shahidah,yun xintt's all... if i've missed out u, sorry. but i've really appreciated it..

some pics...